Ah, the joys of pregnancy – the miracle of life, the anticipation of a new adventure, and the... unexpected appearance of haemorrhoids? Just when you thought you were familiar with all the weird and wonderful surprises that come with carrying a tiny human, these uninvited 🍑 guests decide to pop up and make themselves at home. But fear not! We've got the ultimate guide to evicting these pain-in-the-butt guests.
The Sudden Arrival
So there you are, sailing through the third trimester when suddenly, a collection of grapes appears between your 🍑 cheeks.
You may start to wonder what you did in a past life to experience such a lack of luck, but it may help for you to know that 40% of people will get haemorrhoids during pregnancy, and chances are, your friends probably have their own collection of unwanted guests too! I promise you; you're not alone!
Evicting Unwanted Guests – The Gentle Way
Hot and Cold Therapy: Give your new mates a warm welcome... and then a cold farewell. Alternate between warm sitz baths and cold compresses to soothe discomfort and reduce swelling. Reusable perineal ice packs are a MUST for this.
Topical Treatments: Ditch the shame and head down to your local pharmacy and ask them for some medicated haemorrhoid cream. I mean, you can always say it's for your partner, "ah yes, I think he asked for some hem-ar-oid cream or something? Not sure, can't relate, couldn't be me".... but I don't think they ever believe us anyway, so own your 🍇 and get them gone 👋
The Witch Hazel Wonder: Witch Hazel everything is your new BFF. Homemade witch hazel pads, witch hazel wipes, or just slathering witch hazel straight on your 🍇 can help provide relief and shrink them.
Minimising Discomfort Like a Pro
Stay Hydrated: Drinking enough water keeps your body hydrated and helps prevent constipation, a notorious ally of haemorrhoids.
Grab a Stool: Using a stool when going to the toilet isn't just for toilet training toddlers; putting your feet up on a stool is so important for positioning when going to the toilet, and it will help to reduce straining, which worsens your haemorrhoids.
Fiber Magic: Fiber helps soften stools, making bathroom visits a lot more pleasant (and less dramatic). It won't make your haemorrhoids go away, but it will help to prevent them from getting worse.
No Soap: I hear how that sounds; I don't mean don't wash your 🍑. Just to use a gentler wash without soap, as soap can aggravate haemorrhoids.
Witch Hazel Wipes: Using rough toilet paper can also aggravate haemorrhoids, and as it can be difficult to clean around them, using witch hazel wipes can not only soothe your haemorrhoids but can also help clean them and avoid making them worse.
Permanent Goodbyes – Options for Removal
Medical Options: Consult your healthcare provider about medical treatments such as rubber band ligation or sclerotherapy to bid adieu to these guests for good.
Lifestyle Changes: Incorporating long-term dietary and lifestyle changes can keep those 🍇 at bay, even after you give birth.
Surgical Solutions: In rare cases, surgical procedures might be considered.
There you have it, all our tips for hopefully evicting your uninvited 🍑 guests.
Sometimes they may not go away with the gentler methods, and most people decide just to do what they can to minimise the effect it has on them until they're done having babies before trying more permanent measures.
Remember, most of us who have been pregnant will have them at some point, and you are not alone! ❤️